It is mostly common for men to seek out much younger women, but it is not usually the same in the case of women.
People usually point all kinds of judgmental fingers to women who choose to date younger men. Even in today’s enlightened world, the society still has all kinds of negative things to say about this powerful pairing, labeling older women dating younger men as sexual predators.
They usually accuse these women of preying on impressionable young men, even refering to them as “cougars.”
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But is anything wrong with a woman engaging in a relationship with a younger man? Before we get an answer to that controversial question, let’s consider some benefits as well as challenges involved in cougar dating.
WHY WOMEN DATE YOUNGER MEN
Different women may have varied reasons for forming a relationship with younger men, just as many people may have different reasons for doing the same thing. But some of the most common reasons are summarised below:
- Men her age may not be as attractive.
- She has more relationship experience.
- She is able to take the lead in the bedroom.
- Many men her age are married or in a relationship.
- She wants to feel young again.
- She enjoys experiencing the thrill of dating a younger guy.
- She likes taking charge of financial matters in the relationship.
- Younger guys are more fun.
- The younger guy brings excitement back to the bedroom.
- She’s feeding her ego and proving that she’s still attractive.
While cougar dating may sound quite interesting, it comes with many challenges. A closer look at them would help determine if it’s fitting or not.
CHALLENGES OF COUGAR DATING
Age gap: People usually refer to cougar dating as punishment on the part of the young man because of the unpopular assumption that women age faster than men. They fear that the woman may end up being a burden to the male counterpart at old age.
Gender norm: Gender norms still exist in a huge way, and a woman taking a younger male lover is both a slap in the face to that gendered norm, as well as a power-move.
Stigma: Stigma definitely falls more heavily on the women in these relationships especially from Family and friends. Also the whole ‘sugar mama’ thing has a range of connotations from the negative ‘desperate older woman’ motif.
Power Differences: Just as a younger woman dating an older man, power dynamics can be at play. These can stem from differences in income, career, life experience, or how much she is able to provide. She is at a different stage of her life than the man.She may likely be occupied with her career or she may have more financial security, which can be a source of conflict with people in such relationships.
She may not want to have children (or be able to): An older woman has probably already raised young children and doesn’t want to do it all over again. By the age of 40, her ability to get pregnant is severely compromised, with menopause starting between the ages of 45 and 50. If you want to have a family someday, this is something to consider.
Having considered the ups and downs of cougar dating, what can we conclude? Is it wrong?
Well, it all comes down to personal preferences. Most people usually say it’s best for celebrities since celebrity relationships seems ephemeral. But you can form a lasting union if you so desire. You don’t have to be a star.
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